One Hurdle Done

Well we are about to complete our first trimester as I enter in my 13th week.... AMAZING.

I had my regular obgyn appointment today and our little was looking adorable, heart beating, all snuggly in there. I cannot wait to cradle this life in my arms.

My nuchal screening results all came back normal. Relief.

Now the question is do I do the amniocentesis? I am turning 35 in three weeks and my doctor is leaving it up to me. He did say the amnio is definitive (I think the nuchal screening is about 93% accurate). We are leaning towards doing the amnio, but that half percent rate of miscarriage is scaring me. After all this work, and how far we've come, do I risk it? Even if it's a half percent??? Ugh. Decisions... I am thinking of speaking to my mom's obgyn who is a high risk doctor and see what he says. If my nuchal screening came back normal than maybe that's good enough? But do I need that piece of mind that everything is normal from the amnio? We will decide by Monday. It would be done in 3-4 weeks. Yowza.

But for now the doctor said we are out of the danger zone and we will start to share the news in the coming weeks. I still want to wait till I'm in the middle of my 4th month. It's like I want to tell everyone but then I get too nervous about sharing it-- as if I am jinxing it.

I guess we enjoy this for now and take each day as it comes.

Thank you G-d for keeping our little healthy and strong and growing...

One Year

Well it's exactly one year today that I started this blog not knowing at the time that the focus would be my journey to be a mom....

It is hard to believe that I am about 12 weeks pregnant now and all is well-- thank G-d. We had our nuchal translucency scan today and everything measured completely normal. The doctor said it all looked great, but the final results will come in next week, after they have the blood work done.

We saw our little so alert, moving and wiggling around, with a normal heartbeat. We saw everything-- from its eyes, jaw bones, nose!, legs, tush, arms... I just felt so proud of our little for staying strong and growing so well.

I have been so nervous for today, having had my last ultra sound two weeks ago, not knowing what we'd see today. And I thank G-d that so far everything is fine. We have a regular obgyn appointment next Wednesday and hopefully the NT blood work will be in by then. That is the next milestone.

I haven't written much because I have been feeling so crappy. I am nauseous 24 hours a day, I have been throwing up anywhere from one to five times a day. I even threw up at the ultra sound facility today. I haven't touched any meat, fish, and vegetables in over a month. I am living on salty crackers, cheese sandwiches, and some fruit. Oh and ice cream (need that calcium!). I was loving pizza a few weeks ago, now the thought of anything with tomato sauce makes me want to puke. I gag at smells all the time. I walk in the street with my hand to my nose, especially when I walk by the street food vendors. If I eat a few bites, my stomach sticks out a lot. But otherwise I don't show with clothes on, unless you really look-- there's a little bump.

Tomorrow night begins the Jewish holiday of Yom Kippur-- the most serious and important holiday; the day of atonement. I will be praying hard this year for G-d to continue to bless us with a healthy pregnancy and keep our little safe and healthy in there. I will also be praying as I do every night for all of you out there on your journeys; that you should be blessed with a healthy child very soon and we should all have a year of health, happiness and fertility.

This Feels Surreal

I had a little panic attack today. My boobs felt less sore and even though it had been a week since the last ultra sound, for some reason, it felt like much longer, and I just couldn't sit calmly waiting for our next scan in 13 days. So I called my obgyn and they are so nice there-- they let me come in for an ultra sound today at lunch time.

Everything is good. I saw our little, heart beating and I got to hear the heart this time too. It was magnificent! I am now at exactly 10 weeks ( I was off by a day or two) and all is well. Of course now back at the office, my boobs are sore again and besides that, I'm still throwing up at least once a day...

Anyway-- it just feels so surreal. All of this. I still can't believe this life is growing in me. It looked more like a baby today than before. I wish Dave was there with me to hear the heart, but it was an impromptu visit, so it couldn't be helped. But he's happy and I'm happy-- at least for today :)

Please G-d keep our little safe and healthy and growing strong...