Still Preggars
I am 39 weeks pregnant today--- we are getting soooooooo close!
Today at my weekly Dr. appointment he told me my cervix was soft and I am beginning to dilate! Hoorah! The plan is that if I go past my due date (April 6th), I will go in to the Dr's office the next day for a stress test to make sure the baby is still safe inside me and then, I will be induced on April 10th if I don't give birth before then. The Dr doesn't want me to go past 41 weeks. I'm okay with that-- as I am beyond excited to meet this person who has taken over my body!
My life is about to change in the next 10 days. This is a definite. Yet- my brain has not been able to accept it. I can't imagine it-- I can only fantasize about it. I think I am still afraid to accept it. I think I am afraid to believe that things might actually go smoothly and work out. I think my struggles to conceive are still so with me everyday- that I can't just let go of the fears and embrace the happiness that everyone else feels is going to happen.
I need to hold on to my faith, I know.
Yes I am beyond excited, yes I am bursting with gratitude. But in the end, right now I have to admit, I am scared.
Please please G-d keep our little safe, healthy and growing strong.
Today at my weekly Dr. appointment he told me my cervix was soft and I am beginning to dilate! Hoorah! The plan is that if I go past my due date (April 6th), I will go in to the Dr's office the next day for a stress test to make sure the baby is still safe inside me and then, I will be induced on April 10th if I don't give birth before then. The Dr doesn't want me to go past 41 weeks. I'm okay with that-- as I am beyond excited to meet this person who has taken over my body!
My life is about to change in the next 10 days. This is a definite. Yet- my brain has not been able to accept it. I can't imagine it-- I can only fantasize about it. I think I am still afraid to accept it. I think I am afraid to believe that things might actually go smoothly and work out. I think my struggles to conceive are still so with me everyday- that I can't just let go of the fears and embrace the happiness that everyone else feels is going to happen.
I need to hold on to my faith, I know.
Yes I am beyond excited, yes I am bursting with gratitude. But in the end, right now I have to admit, I am scared.
Please please G-d keep our little safe, healthy and growing strong.
posted by Here I am @ 4:54 PM
3 Comments:
At 6:40 AM ,
Christy said...
I'll be holding lots of love, hope and faith for you, as well as my breath! I'm so excited to meet your little as well! I'll pray that your fear subsides as you ride out these last 10 days. Hang in there, the end is almost in sight and you are doing a great job!
At 1:55 PM ,
Kelly Hutcheson said...
I can relate so much with what you're saying. I'm due tomorrow and can't actually picture it happening!!
At 2:24 PM ,
Gemini Girl said...
it will be fine. My girls are 4.5 months old and I still cant wrap my head around the fact that I am a mom- of two. I still dont feel like a mom- whatever that's supposed to feel like! it will be fine, I just cant wait for the baby post!
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